The Doldrums

Yeah, you  know what the doldrums are, don't ya? Officially they are an area near the equator where the wind doesn't blow. Or at least it doesn't blow hard enough to move a ship with sails. And that would be were the phrase, took the wind right out of our sails originates. or maybe it doesn't, but it sure feels like it.It is where the phrase doldrums comes from in relation to going nowhere. And it feels like we are going NOWHERE! Especially after we got an email that doesn't look good yesterday. We are really excited about a sibling group of boys out west and they are part Native American, part Latino. We have no idea where we are on the "list" of prospective parents, but we feel really good about it. And our case worker said we'd be a good match because we really want siblings. pshaw, one kid at a time, who needs that?! we want them all at once! Anyway. So, this group of kids look good for us, then we get an email from our case worker that a Native American woman is interested in the boys. %$^#^@%$#^$& yeah, all those words went through my head and some probably made it out of my mouth. Felt like I had been kicked in the gut, punched in the head, any other little metaphor you want to think of. Needless to say, I feel like the wind has just been taken out of our sails. So we sit. and wait. The tribal case worker has the file, if the woman is a good fit, she gets the kids. I'm have no idea what would make her not a good fit, but who knows. she's native. If my sister could only find the paperwork to prove I am part native american, I'd be bumped to the top of the list. damnit. Sean says he still feels good about those boys and that they will be ours. I'm not as hopeful. But then, I'm the pessimist in this situation.